#i’m gonna have to take a break from this app bc holy fuck

[lovedeluxe92]

and what the fuck is this now?!

[onlyjaeyun]

zadie, my beloved.

i finally got the balls to finally write this 🙏🏼

first of all i wanted to start off with happy new year zadie :D i hope this year is filled with happiness, health and success for u ! time has passed by a blur ever since you started releasing hype boy and i found out about ur acc (one of the best things to happen to me in 2023 🤞) anywho im gonna try to keep this as not-dramatic as possible but holy FUCK sb ended. 😕☹️ it’s just crazy for me to wrap my head around the fact that it’s over now jongyn sailed and had a baby like- ✋ pls don’t talk to me rn. as someone who’s went through hype boy, poison and now sb (and soon cold hearts U BETTER BE TAKING UR BREAK THO OR ISTG🤾) this is just crazy to me yk like i can’t believe it’s over 💔💔 anyways you did so so so well with writing everything ! you’re one of my inspirations for writing and one of my main reasons to taking it seriously :] so i just wanted to mainly direct this towards you than sb tho i still haven’t accepted the fact that it’s over ngl, you’re so ridiculously talented and open minded in writing in a way that you think of stories along with plot twists that i personally couldn’t (for the life of me) see coming from miles away, you’re one of my favourite authors on this app and with every work by yours that i read i get impressed like :0 holy shit you wrote that about my fav ppl and i get to read it for FREE? 😨 with each work of yours there was clear development in your skill and talent and it made me realise that there really is no “peak” when it comes to writing or story telling and it’s just improvement and improvement and improvement and your works very obviously show that (all ur works are jaw droppingly incredible btw like not a single bad work istg.) and before this gets too long i just wanted to sincerely thank you for your service on the enhypen-tumblr community 🙏🏼 you truly are one of the main pillars for this entire community istg and you’re genuinely so talented like your work literally has me giggling and kicking my feet in the air. like always.

anywho love you so much zadie ! i’m sending u so many hugs & kisses i hope you’re taking care of yourself and taking your very much needed break i can’t wait to see what your plans are for cold hearts !! <3

- ⁉️

my love, my angel, my baby my everything pls ive read this three times and teared up each time i hope you know how much your words mean to me 🥺🤍🫧☁️

thank you SO much for this, it deffo gave me just what i needed, like you're always so genuine and so sweet and SO FUNNY TOO LIKE I LOVE READING YOUR ASKS BC ITS ME GOING CRAZY OVER MY MOOT'S WRITING I LOVE IT SM 😭🤍 so thank you thank you thank you for always taking the time out of your day to send me such detailed and genuine, kind and thoughtful words i cant even explain how much it means to me. i love and appreciate youu so much and hope 2024 brings you nothing but the best and a peaceful mind. sending you the fattest kiss. thank you for being by my side, can't wait to have you around for cold hearts 🥺🤍

[glassamphibians]

what demigods & co would do on TikTok and what video got them followers:

(we’re gonna pretend demigods can use phones now) (also this is a very long post)

Percy: He mostly posts videos of him skateboarding in New Rome or fun videos of his friends. When he went back home for break he posted a video of him skating down the streets of NYC with cool music over it that got some attention, but he didn’t start doing numbers until someone else duetted it pointing out that he looked really similar to that kid who was on the news a few years ago for domestic terrorism. Percy then duetted that video and just said “oh yeah lol i forgot about that anyway look at this sick kick-flip.” He never mentions it again but whenever someone leaves a comment about it he replies ;)

Annabeth: She makes a lot of videos giving advice for studying and getting through college for people who have ADHD that are always super aesthetically pleasing. she also has a lot of videos that are just shots of New Rome being pretty and everyone thinks “wow she has her life together” until she posts a video at like one in the morning of her designing her architecture project in Minecraft the night before its due. the building she’s designed is beautiful. there are four empty coffee mugs next to the keyboard. her eyes are red from staring at the screen for so long. she doesn’t speak a single word and the silence is overwhelming. 

Jason: he has an account but its on private. He shows up in a lot of his friends older videos, though. i have somehow managed to make this post sad and i will not be apologizing for it.

Piper: She was MADE for the indie kid color-costomizer side of tiktok and she knows it. She posts a lot of her just vibing, singing along to her favorite songs, doing the trendy dances, etc etc. I love her but she’s 100% one of the people who takes “alt tiktok vs straight tiktok” too seriously. her bio is “yes i listen to girl in red <3.″ her most popular video is of her going “wait!!! i have an idea” and then singing a beautiful mashup of two songs. she ends it by cringing and going “oof okay that was rough but i couldn’t stop thinking about it” and everyone in the comments is freaking out over it. she’s not verified but she should be.

Leo: he builds the most complicated, useless things in the world and then makes videos explaining them like he’s on Shark Tank. he’s also an absolute memer and makes a ton of jokes using all the popular sounds. theres one video of him just doing a generic tiktok meme but the smoke alarm is going off and you can literally see flames in the background but he’s paying no attention to them. it gets over a million likes and all the comments are losing their minds but he doesn’t respond to any of them. in fact, he doesn’t post for three days after and everyone is fully convinced he’s dead until he posts another video acting like nothing happened.

Hazel: she is the only enjoyable thing about cottagecore left on that godforsaken app. most of her videos are of her with either her horse, frank, or Nico and they always have really old music playing over them. she has an ongoing series where she talks about whatever new pop culture thing she learned about that week because she “grew up sheltered” as she puts it. one of them is of Percy trying to explain memes to her and Nico and its going horribly because every question they ask unpacks another layer of niche internet history that they don’t know about. Nico is laughing his ass off while Percy and Hazel get progressively louder and Percy just looks. so tired.

Frank: He’s in a ton of Hazel and Percy’s videos and people kept asking if he had a tiktok bc he always seems so nice so eventually he made one but he rarely posts. When he does post its typically kinda clumsy videos of him just rambling or trying out filters but one day he posts a video of him practicing at the archery range and it blows up bc holy fuck he’s good??? he then makes another video and he’s like “I’m happy everyone enjoyed my archery so much but i really wasn’t expecting it to get that big and i was just warming up so here’s me doing that so um. yeah. thanks again!” and then he does some cool archery stuff and it gets popular Again and he pretends he’s not proud of himself but everyone can tell he is.

Reyna: she also doesn’t really post but she has a view videos of the garden in New Rome she likes and the Hunters messing around. Her friends were the only ones following her until she posted a video of her doing pushups while Nico sat criss-cross applesauce on her back. He and Jason, who’s filming, are having a completely normal conversation. As expected the sapphics eat that shit up and Reyna gets an huge following overnight that she has no idea what to do with.

Thalia: Owns alt tiktok. she is the queen of it there is no debate. She makes tons of videos jamming out to bikini kill and duetting conservatives to debunk everything they’re saying and educate people about the politics that go hand in hand with being punk. Her most popular video is her talking about the history of riot grrrl and giving music recommendations for people just getting into the scene.

Rachel: She posts time lapses of her painting, but they’re blown out so you can see the entire room. they don’t stop when she goes to sleep or eat or has friends over because Rachel herself rarely stops painting unless she has to. she also does a lot of the trends where you assign your friends aesthetics or you text them weird things to see how they respond. In one of her time lapses she just stands there for a few seconds and then her eyes start glowing and smoke starts pouring out of her mouth and then she just. goes back to painting? when people ask “hey what was that lol” in the comments she just goes “i was struck with inspiration :)”

apollo: hate to say it but he’s probably doing some hype house thirst trap shit. he posts one (1) haiku and the entire app makes fun of it for a week and it becomes an instantly recognizable meme. it is not the attention he wanted but he’ll take it regardless.

meg: absolute gremlin. she makes posts using her powers in full view and then just goes “ahahah special effects :) i’m a thirteen year old special effects prodigy who loves plants :)” only has like three posts but they’re all super popular somehow??? she is an enigma. 

Will: most of his videos are of him and his friends or cheesy star wars memes. all of his videos radiate Good Vibes and he’s lowkey?? kinda popular on there. he definitely gets those comments that are like “omg golden retriever boy🥺🥺” that is, until he duets this video of someone giving god awful medical advice. he goes the fuck off on the person which is a contrast to what he normally posts already but its even weirder bc its in the dark with the flash on and he’s mad and theres,,, saxophone playing in the background??? just some smooth jazz while Will lectures this person and it’s incredibly entertaining to see.

Nico: he adamantly refused to get tiktok for a long time, but he shows up in most of Will’s videos and a bunch of his other friends so people are constantly asking if he has one. eventually Will convinces him to get one and it is the most chaotic thing in the world. He only posts super late at night in total darkness with the flash on and his face in barely in frame and he says just the most concerning things. no one can tell if he’s joking or not. sometimes theres bones??? that look very human??? in one video he says “i just wanna see if this works.” the camera goes black, theres a bunch of loud distorted sounds and then its daytime and he’s somewhere that is obviously Not America. the camera is back on his face and he looks significantly more tired than before. he says “oh cool the phone still works” and then theres a bunch of clamoring, some muffled swearing, and the video ends. the next day he duets that and says “that was meant for friends only lmao fbi please look away you didn’t see shit” and all the comments are from his friends yelling at him. 

[vintagedolan]

hey!!! big big fan of all your work bub, thanks for the effort you put into everything! not sure if ur taking requests, if not just ignore, but i have a potential one here;) so i’m a sups independent girl, almost to a fault lol, part bc i love being independent and part sometimes bc i just don’t want to burden others. and my friend once joked about if something were to ever happen and i’d need to go to the hospital, i’d legit try to take myself. SO i was wondering, could you maybe write (1/2)

(2/2) i was wondering if you’d write something about one of the boys’s S.O’s having stomach pain or smth and maybe she has to get her appendix out and she’s driving herself and her man finds out and he’s like, angry she didn’t say anything but also gets worried and idk hopefully this makes sense if not no worries ���� have a nice night, bug xx

okay but why is this concept actually some shit I would do lmao

You missed the porsche. There, you said it. Maybe it was because you had so many memories tied to it’s leather seats - Gray driving you home after your first date, the late night PCH drives, the morning coffee runs. You were emotionally attached to the thing, you couldn’t help it.

But holy shit were you glad that he’d gotten a tesla that day.

“Fucking shit.” You winced, doubling over again after just a few steps. When it started, you thought it was just cramps, or maybe even something you ate. But by the second time you’d thrown up, you knew something else was going on, the stabbing pain in your lower right side excruciating. 

“Breathe, just breathe,” you mumbled to yourself, scrambling through the drawer of the table of the foyer until you found the key you needed - Grayson always just used his phone to start his car, but you knew the little car shaped thing had to be somewhere. 

Sure enough, you gripped in your hands so hard that you accidentally pressed the button that made the doors open automatically. Usually you’d mutter about how unnecessary it was, all the over top technology when you could just open the door yourself.

But when you managed to get in, a few tears slipping from your eyes as you punched in hospital on the GPS and flipped auto pilot on, leaning back in the seat and clutching your stomach, you were thankful for all the bells and whistles. The drive time popped up as the car started to move - 15 minutes. You just had to make it 15 minutes.

At a Wakeheart meeting on the other side of town, Grayson’s phone buzzed.

He moved it quickly off the tabletop, a bit embarrassed. It didn’t matter that he was the CEO of the whole thing, he didn’t want any of his team to think he didn’t care about his meeting. Still, he checked it quickly under the table in case it was a text from you.

Instead, it was a notification from his Tesla app, and the tag line had his heart rate rising with every word he read.

Headed to the hospital? If you are in an emergency, please do not rely on autopilot and call 911 immediately to seek medical assistance.

He put his phone back up on the table, sliding it over to Ethan. He didn’t have to say anything - Ethan just knew, and by the way his brow furrowed over the screen, Grayson understood.

“Hey guys, really sorry but can we take a five minute break? Gotta troubleshoot something really quick.”

He was met with mumbles of understanding that he didn’t pay attention to as he stepped out into the hallway, Ethan on his heels.

“You’ve never gotten anything like that before?” 

“Nah bro, I have no idea what that’s about. Hold on I’ll look it up.” Ethan typed furiously on his phone for a moment, eyes going wide.

“Uh, it says it comes up if you put a hospital into the GPS and enable autopilot. It’s a safety feature, so you can’t try to hold them liable if autopilot fails and you’re like dying or something. But who would be - oh shit.”

Grayson was two steps ahead of him, already clicking your contact.

Inside the tesla, you let out another groan as you saw his name pop up on the screen. You knew if you didn’t answer he would just keep calling, and you had the sinking feeling that he was somehow onto you. You clicked the green button and tried to steady your voice.

“Hello?”

“Are you good?”

“Yeah, I’m uh - I’m okay. Why?”

“Oh you know, just the fact that my phone told me my tesla is in route to a fucking hospital right now? What the fuck babe?”

Fuck. There was no way to play that off, and if there was, you couldn’t think of it quick enough. 

“Ummmmm.. shit,” you winced again, grabbing at your side with a whimper.

“Y/N tell me what’s going on, no bullshit. Please, you’re scaring me.” His tone was pleading, and you couldn’t resist it.

“I think it’s my appendix. Hurts like a bitch, and if they rupture that can be really bad. So I’m going to the -“ you sucked in another breath, trying to keep it together. “- To the hospital.

“Jesus, why didn’t you call me? I could have taken you, you shouldn’t be driving!”

“I’m fin-”

“You aren’t fine. I’m coming. I’m on my way.”

“Okay.” You didn’t have the heart to argue with him, you were in too much pain, and you knew he was only going to be more mad when he realized that if it really was your appendix, they were going to have you in surgery as soon as they could.

You made it through the last few minutes of the drive, taking the tesla off auto and doing your very best to park it. 

You must not have been playing it off as well as you thought you were, because someone took one look at you headed for the ER doors and they were running inside to get someone to help.

It was a bit humiliating to be eased down into a wheelchair by a very nice nurse and wheeled in through the doors, but the pain was so bad that you felt like you were going to pass out any minute. So you let it happen, let them wheel you in and take you back almost immediately, get you changed into a gown and check you out. The pain was immense, but they didn’t want to give you anything to ease it with the likelihood of surgery right around the corner. So you ground your teeth and tried to fight through it, sucking in deep breaths as your insides felt like they were ripping apart.

“Well Y/N, it’s looking like surgery. Did anyone come here with you, anyone you want to bring back?” The doctor asked quickly when he finally came in, already starting to get the paperwork moving. 

“I came alone, but my boyfriend is on his - on his way. Grayson Dolan. Please let him back here if he gets here, please,” you pleaded, knowing he would be more than upset if he didn’t see you before you got taken back.

“I’ll have one of the nurses check the waiting room. 

“Ethan Dolan too, if he’s here.”

“Okay, you just try to relax, I’ll go see.” 

Relaxing wasn’t in your capabilities, but you did let out a sigh of relief when you saw them come through the door.

Grayson on the other hand was anything but relieved when he saw the look on your face and realized just how much pain you were in. He was at your side immediately, Ethan over his shoulder - more for his sake than for yours.

“Baby -” he was out of breath, no doubt having raced to the hospital and run inside as quickly as he could.

“I’m okay, I’m gonna be fine,” you moved to reassure him, trying to reach out for him. It backfired, sending more pain into your side that had you sucking in a breath. “You don’t have to worry.”

“Bullshit, of course I’m gonna worry. The nurse said you’re going back for surgery?” 

“Yeah.” As if on cue the doctor came back in, ready to take you back.

“Sorry I didn’t tell you,” you whispered, feeling guilty. If the roles were reversed, you would be more than mad, and it was all you could think about.

“Shhhh, stop. I love you, just come back to me in one piece, okay?” He leaned over and kissed your forehead - the pain had you hazy, but you managed to get out a “I love you too” before they wheeled you out.

It was a quick surgery, which was a blessing for Grayson’s nerves that were already worn thin. His foot bounced from the minute he sat down in the waiting room all the way until the nurse came to find them again, letting him know that you’d made it through surgery with no issues.

When you finally managed to open your eyes, Grayson was right there, one of your hands clasped in his. You were loopy from the anesthesia still in your system and you gave him a goofy smile. 

“You’s mad at me,” you said, and though you meant to be sad it came out as a giggle. 

“A little bit, yes, Ms. I-never-ask-for-help,” he sighed, but there wasn’t a trace of bite in his tone.

“Sowwwy,” you slurred, squeezing his hand as best you could. He brought your hand up to his lips, kissing each of your knuckles as you started to wake up a bit more, bleary eyes opening further.

“It’s okay baby. Besides, you get to let me take care of you for the next week. Doctor’s orders, so you can’t argue either. That’ll make up for it.”

“You have work,” you countered, making him laugh as he moved up the bed and kissed your forehead again.

“Ethan and I cleared our week, you’re stuck with me. I get to pamper you,” he teased, running his fingers through your hair as he moved it back out of your face.

“Gross,” you grumbled, trying to keep up the facade. You never liked to be taken care of, no matter how much Grayson tried to.

“I’m glad you’re okay baby. Just promise to call me next time, okay? Taking care of you is part of my boyfriend duties, it’d be nice if you let me do it sometimes.”

You mumbled out the promise, but you were smiling as best you could and nodding, just glad to have him there with you, the idea of him being curled up in bed with you for a few days warming you up to the idea. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all. 

[gladiatortale]

My DEPRESSION BEATING, fandom obsessing, shit-tastic FANTASTIC year in review!

TL;DR: I’m fixing my mental health and figuring out WHO THE FUCK I AM one fandom filled day at a time! Thank you to everyone who’s been there for me along the way. xoxo

what’s up HEATHENS.

stating the goddamn obvious here, it’s been a HELLUVA YEAR. One emotional rollercoaster after another but we’re ALMOST DONE. I know things aren’t gonna magically get better the second it flips to 00:01 on January first, but I’m excited to put this year behind me, and (SHOCKINGLY) a bit sad to see it go.

It was a year where the whole world completely stopped, we realized what is really important, what is really worth fighting for, and took a GODDAMN SECOND to just breathe.

For me personally, the year (which I’m counting off from November 1st) started out UNBELIEVABLY SHIT. I had just been kicked out of the country I called home for the last four years (thank you Brexit), I had ZERO job prospects, my depression was the WORST it had ever been, and I just didn’t want to get out of bed in the morning. And in the beginning, the pandemic felt like salt in the wound, an extra kick in the teeth to my early twenties that had already “failed to launch.”

But I tried to embrace the madness, really take advantage of the world (that I always thought moved to fast) properly slowing down, and take time to try and become myself again. I wanted to figure out what I loved and try and become a bit more like the person I was before my depression got so bad.

I often say I became that Manic Trash Planet Lady™ you see in sci-fi adventure films; a bit zany to say the least, with a million ideas and a very eclectic fashion sense, but embracing the insanity as it comes...

*cough cough* audrey, get to the goddamn point!

Right. lol. THE POINT IS! 

I’m not 100% “healed”, I’m not sure if I think depression is a “oh look you’re officially cured! hooray!” type of disease, but this year I let myself ENJOY SHIT for the first time in god knows how long. I still don’t know “wHaT i WaNt To dO WiTh mY LiFe”, but I’ve got a better idea and I’m heading in (what feels like) the right direction. And most of all, I can look back and say I am better than where I was a year ago.

So I wanted to say T H A N K Y O U to the mad lads on this website that introduced me to the fandoms, shows, movies, fics... THE SHIT that made me happy this year and were there to be one (BIG) piece in my healing journey.

AND SO, with out further rambling ADO! Here are the highlights of the year marked by my ridiculous hyper-fixations and OBSESSIONS. Thanks for putting up with me ya fiends, xoxox

November 2019  The Arcana (Visual Novel)

I had just gotten home and I was in a LOOOOOOW place. Randomly decided to download this app when it came up and it proceeded to ruin my life (and my bank account...) for pretty much the rest of the year. It was exactly what I needed to get me through a tough time and I was thoroughly, horse-blinders-up-to-the-rest-of-the-world, OBSESSED. These gorgeous magical fiends ruined me and all I could say was thank you.

Joined the fandom: November 2019 Obsession peaked: Late November Obsession faded: December 2019; I started a new job AND my bank statement came in and I realized I had accidentally spent over SIXTY BUCKS on this stupid app. No ragrets, but I definitely started to phase out at that point. Fandom friends: Velma, (@lanavxds on insta) miss you girlie xx Fanfics you NEED to read: ‘Second Mistake’ by DeathBelle on AO3, because DAAAAAYUM SON. Favourite moments: Basically the whole of the Julian arc. That gangly himbo OWNED my ass for a month.

December 2019 Hazbin Hotel (TV Series)

Y’ALL okay here me out. Am I proud of this one? No. Is the show crass as hell? OOOOOOOOHHHH YEAH. Did my angsty ass love it at the end of last year? DAMN STRAIGHT IT DID. Goes without saying, but this is NOT FOR EVERYBODY, but it definitely helped me along the way to becoming more comfortable with myself and being open about being the massive geek that I always was, and watching things I enjoy regardless of what people say about it.

Joined the fandom: December 2019 Obsession peaked: Shortly there after. Fandom friends: None. Dipped one toe in fandom discourse and then promptly YEETED the fuck outta there. Obsession faded: January 2019. Still curious to see the full series if A24 actually ever does produce the whole thing, but I have def moved away from it. Fanfics you NEED to read: Haven’t read any. Maybe I’m a pussy baby piece-o-shit, but I DID NOT want to go down that rabbit hole, NO MA’AM. Favourite moments:

Discovering the Hunicast podcast. These guys are a riot and Ashley is a flustered GEM. Even if you don’t watch the show, go watch an episode of these fucking LADS just dicking about and your day will get better.

Watching the first episode with my partner and watching him realize his girlfriend is a total freak.

January 2020 Lore Olympus (Webtoon Comic)

*Officially* discovered this one thanksgiving weekend in 2019, but my Arcana phase was still raging pretty strong at that point so I didn’t really get in to it until later. EVERYBODY AND THEIR MOTHER NEEDS TO READ IT. It has everything and handles the reality sexual assault and it’s aftermath EXTREMELY well.

Joined the fandom: Late November 2019 Obsession peaked: January 2020 Fandom friends: KELLEY. MA GIRL XOXOXO Obsession faded: June-ish 2020. I’m like 10 chapters behind now, but I still love this story so much. Fanfics you NEED to read: SO MANY ON MY ‘MARKED FOR LATER’ LIST AAAAAH. I have to get to that... NEW YEARS RESOLUTION lol Favourite moments: Having a drunk conversation on New Years Eve in 2019 with one of my oldest friends from high school about how much she loved it too. Helped me see how popular fandom and fandoms, are especially after feeling like I needed to hide my enthusiasm through high school and uni. (THAT WAS A MISTAKE BUT I’LL GET THERE IN A MINUTE).

February 2020 Versailles (TV Series)

SO FUCKING GAY Y’ALL. Oh my god everyone in this show is so gay. Even when they’re not they still are a little bit. AND BEST OF ALL!! it’s very historically accurate (except for the demon satanic nonsense in season 3, what was that???)

Joined the fandom: February 2020 Obsession peaked: Like??? The SECOND I finished episode one. Fandom friends: none... WHERE ARE ALL OF YOU??? Obsession faded: March 2020. It was a fast and passionate love affair, what can I say? Fanfics you NEED to read: IF YOU HAVE RECS, GIVE ‘EM TO MEEEEE. Favourite moments: 

Showing the first episode to a friend of mine and the *ungodly GASP* that came out of her throat was... PRICELESS.

The ENTIRE throuple(???) relationship between the Chevalier, Philipe, and Palatine. PLATONIC/ ROMANTIC LOVE G O A L S.

March 2020 Yuri!!! On Ice (TV Series)

*deep breath* ...y’all knew this one was coming.

Was I ready for this show to ruin my fucking life? No.  Am I so glad it happened??? FUCK YEAH.

NEVER IN MY LIFE have I fallen off the deep end so quickly with a fandom. HOLY SHIT. This blog didn’t have much of an “identity” before, but I you said that this is a Yuri On Ice blog now I wouldn’t even be mad (nor could I really defend myself to the contrary... bc??? like??? just go LOOK at my archive). Craziest thing is I watched the first two episodes like?? a solid TWO YEARS ago, but I didn’t continue watching because I was just not in the right head space for all the love and silliness and positivity.

I could do a whole separate post about how much this show and how this fandom has changed my life (DON’T TEMPT ME I JUST MIGHT). But I’ll stick with the highlights for now ;)

Joined the fandom: March 2020  Obsession peaked: Has it peaked?? Went straight up and it still going lol Fandom friends: Sandra, my mentor, my queen @aeriamamaduck, my fandom ride-or-die. Thank you for taking this internet bby under your wing. RACHEL @idancewiththefairies I TRAPPED YOU HERE. MUAHAHAHA xxx Obsession faded: ON GOING. CAN’T STOP, WON’T STOP. Fanfics you NEED to read: jfc, SO MANY.

‘Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches’ and ‘Of Bright Stars and Burning Hearts’ by Reiya @kazliin​ -- Rivals AU companion pieces. Longest fics I’ve ever read and JESUS CHRIST these two fucking SENT ME. Most popular YOI fics on AO3 for a REASON.

‘Tell Me Where Your Love Lies’ by @aeriamamaduck -- Royalty AU, trope-breaking ABO. Ah sweet, TMWYLL, how you’ve killed me over and over again. This BEAUTIFUL wip has SUCH amazing world-building idk where to start (Congrats on passing 50,000 hits!) EVERYONE GO READ IT.

‘Blackbird’ by sixpences -- WWII/Coldwar Spy Fic. I don’t have enough words to describe how amazing this is. It’s elevated to a higher plane beyond fanfic. Just go read it. Thank me later.

‘Zanka’ by rinsled05 @dreaming-fireflies -- The geisha fic that ruined me. *deep breath* AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH *gasp* I’m fine. lol I sooooo not ready for this fic. Holy hell, Aoyagi had my heart in his hands from the first chapter. “’Please’ [...] ‘Don’t give me hope.’“ FUUUUCK.

‘Echoes’ by Reiya @kazliin -- Future fic. First fic I cried at... BOI. I was NOT ready for this. Shouldn’t be surprised given the author, but MAN. “‘A love like that, a love like what they had together, it never leaves completely.’ Yuri spoke again, eyes still staring out onto the ice, lost in memory. ‘There are always echoes.’” JUST FUCK ME UP.

Favourite moments: Oh good lord, where do I begin??

Having two (count ‘em TWO) main characters with mental health issues (Yuuri and his anxiety and Victor with burn out and depression) and NOT MAKING IT THE ONLY ASPECT OF THEIR PERSONALITY. CLAPS FOR KUBO AND YAMAMOTO!!

Everything about Yurio (ESPECIALLY HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH YUUKO AND HIS GRANDPA), that tsundere motherfucker is too pure for this world.

THE KISS. THE PROPOSAL. MY HEART WASN’T READY. AAAAAH!!

This fandom *properly* introducing me to smut on AO3...

Thinking I was going to get Rachel to like the show... NOT being prepared for her to fall off the deep end and START LIKING REAL SKATING TOO!!

Staying up waaaaaay too late waaaaaay too often to plan out plot points for TMWYLL with Sandra. Love ya dearie.

The warm fuzzy feeling I get every time I think about Victor and Yuuri.

April 2020 Bungou Stray Dogs (TV Series)

I had a hunch I was gonna like this show considering ALL of the characters are based off of famous classic authors from around the world... what I was NOT prepared for was just HOW MUCH I was going to love it. HOLY SHIT. The art style? Love it. The plot?? Bonkers, but so fun. THE VOICE CAST??? AMAZING. Highly recommend to anyone who wants to get in to anime, great place to start.

Joined the fandom: April 2020 Obsession peaked: Probably this summer? But we have DEF plateaued in a VERY high place. Fandom friends: FIJI. MA BOIIIII @lil-1nsane  Obsession faded: Hasn’t. Hope it doesn’t Fanfics you NEED to read: So so so many. The smut in this fandom is *chef’s kiss*, but here are a few...

‘He Works Hard For the Money’ by CataclysmicEvent @cataclysmicevent2019​ -- Sugar Daddy AU. FUCK MAN. I was not expecting to like this one, but bloody hell. This fic grabbed me by the throat and WOULD NOT let me go. Praying for chapter 16! But the author is working on another STELLAR fic so I’m okay for now.

‘Everything or Nothing’ by CataclysmicEvent @cataclysmicevent2019​ -- University AU. FUCK THIS FIC. Started reading it as I was waiting for HWHFTM to update and BOI, this fic ROCKS. The alternating POV fits so well with the enemies/idiots-to-lovers vibe. Solid 10 outta 10.

‘The City Where Wind Blows’ by @raven-rein​ -- Cancer Death fic. *pained shriek* AAAAAAGUUUUUUUHHHH *gasp* aaaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHHH, FUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKK MEEEEE. THIS FIC. Only the second fic I’ve ever cried to but I BAWLED MY GODDAMN EYES OUT. FUUUUUUUCK. I was not ready, never would have been ready. This is so tremendously well done, it killed me so beautifully, 

‘Haunted by Hatred’ by DeathBelle -- Canon compliant Soukoku. It is a CRIME that DeathBelle doesn’t have more BSD fics on her page, but this one is still brilliant.

Favourite moments:

THE CHUUYA-DAZAI MAFIA REUNION TEAM UP WHEN THEY FIGHT LOVECRAFT. Ooof. BOI. We love it.

The first three episodes. Soooo many break neck plot twists.

Every insane hypothetical conversation with Fiji.

Every time Atsushi or Tanizaki is on screen bc I LOVE THESE LIL BEANS.

June 2020 Trash Taste (Podcast)

Goddamn I love these chaotic lads so much.

As I became more and more comfortable with myself and my love for anime I stumbled upon these three goons, -- Joey, Connor, and Garnt, -- best known for there SUPER successful (mostly) anime YouTube channels. Even if you don’t watch anime, WATCH/LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST. The focus is mostly on their lives and the overall expat/immigrant experience, with a bit of anecdotal anime references sprinkled in. 

This show is both wholesome and heathenous in equal measure, and after having lived abroad for a significant portion of my (admittedly still quite short) life, it was such a breath of fresh air to hear people talk so openly about how living outside your home country is both wonderful and terrifying. They’re wonderfully candid about the fact that even if you love a place dearly, no where is perfect, and you WILL hate somethings about your new home even if the majority of the experience is fantastic. I cannot rate this show highly enough.

Joined the fandom: June 5th 2020, loved it from the first episode. Obsession peaked: July maybe? I was RELIGIOUS about watching the episodes as soon as they came out. Still watch every week, but less “on time.” Fandom friends: None :( but I have tricked my partner in to listening several times :) Obsession faded: It’s dimmed from where it was, but still going strong. Fanfics you NEED to read: NONE. NEVER PLAN TO. Hard and fast rule, I don’t read fics about real people. Characters played by real people, even that’s a maybe for me. But real-real people? FUCK NO. (some of my) Favourite moments:

Any time Garnt and Connor get into a big-brain-monkey-brain argument and Joey is just LOSING his GODDAMN MIND in the corner.

Bringing a retired Japanese porn star in the show for an honest conversation about consensual sex work and showing people can have more than one career in life.

Everything about the, ‘Are Online Friends Real Friends?’ episode. GO WATCH IT, it’s brilliant.

Garnt making “chotto-THE-FUCKING-matte” an expression

August 2020 Great Pretender (TV Series)

Spent most of the summer marinating in my BSD and YOI bubbles, until THIS BAD BOI came up on my Netflix recommendations. HOOOO BOI. This is some Anime Of The Year shit right here. Has a pretty original concept (Catch Me If You Can by way of Oceans 11-ish) but generally starts out like most other shounen (sans the super powers). AND THEN EPISODE FIVE HAPPENS. Not gonna spoil it but they TOOK THAT SHIT UP A NOTCH. Brilliant, even with a bit of an insane ending. GO WATCH THIS ONE.

Joined the fandom: August 2020 Obsession peaked: Pretty much as soon as I started watching it. Fandom friends: What’s up Fiji ;) @lil-1nsane Obsession faded: Naturally faded, but so glad I watched Fanfics you NEED to read: None so far! Little scared about this one, heard mixed reviews, but maybe someday. Favourite moments:

Edamame’s “madness arc” at the end of season 2. HOOOO BOY.

Laurent getting fucking WRECKED when Edamame punches him mid way through season 2, kills me every time.

Introducing my partner to anime with this show.

October 2020 Attack on Titan (TV Series)

RETURN OF THE KING. lol

In my quest to find an anime that I can watch with my partner, I turned on season 1 of this bad boi. Holy hell I forgot how much I loved this show, NO WONDER everyone lost their goddamn minds when this show first aired. I NEED to catch up before all the season four spoilers come to get me...

Joined the fandom: Winter 2016 Obsession peaked: Basically as soon as I started watching it. Fandom friends: None yet, but I know you’re out there... Obsession faded: 2017, JUST BEFORE SEASON TWO... I should have stuck around longer I know, but it’s slowly coming back. Reeeeeally need to catch up on seasons two, three, and four. Fanfics you NEED to read: GIVE ME YOUR RECS HEATHENS. Favourite moments:

Watching my partner FREAK OUT about Eren’s “death.”

EVERYTHING ABOUT POTATO GORL! lol

Getting in a conversation with a die hard fan after I hadn’t watched it in three years and saying... “Who’s that blond bitch that cries all the time?”/ “Armin?”/ “THAT’S THE ONE!”

November 2020... kind of. Figure Skating (Sport)

Okay this one is a bit hard to explain. 

I have been a DIE HARD figure skating for A LOOOOOONG time. My grandmother got me a hat from the 2002 Olympics in Salt Lake City and I remember watching even then. But I first became consciously aware of different skaters, my faves, etc. from about 2010. I vividly remember watching Plushenko skating in 2014 while on a school trip to Hawaii, and my friends laughing at me as I yelled at the TV.

But I didn’t TRULY get involved in the fandom side of it until this year. I had all this knowledge bottled up, but didn’t have any skating friends to talk to... UNTIL NOW. Super ironic that this happened in a year with almost NO skating, but I’ll take what I can get ;) Also did I stay up until FOUR-GODDAMN-THIRTY IN THE MORNING a few nights ago to stream Japanese Nationals on my phone??? YOU BET I DID.

Joined the fandom: Three times; 2002, 2010, and 2020. Obsession peaked: 2014? 2018? Idk it peaks any time someone does something amazing. Fandom friends: Rachel, my girl @idancewiththefairies​, WHY DIDN’T I INTRODUCE YOU TO THIS SOONER??? Obsession faded: Hasn’t. Won’t. lol Fanfics you NEED to read: NOPE. NONE. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. No fanfics about real people. Never gonna change that. (some of my) Favourite moments:

Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir doing THAT routine at the 2018 Olympics.

Rachel​ sheepishly admitting to me that Shoma may have replaced Yuzu as her favourite, and me being SO DAMN PROUD of her for growing and developing her own skating opinions apart from me.

Yuzu’s 2012 ‘Romeo and Juliet’ routine and Worlds. THE RAW FUCKING POWER OF THAT SKATE.

Plushenko, cheeky bastard, changing his 2014 Team Event routine AS IT WAS HAPPENING.

The worlds friendliest rivalry between Yuzu and Nathan.

Any thing the Shibutani’s do, and all they do to break up the stereotype that all of Ice Dancing has to be rOmAnTiC and SeNsUaL to be good.

Watching my early faves become coaches and the D R A M A.

Honorable Mentions:

Coco (Film): I watched this the weekend I came home and I owe this movie a lot. It is so sweet an heartwarming, and it a roundabout way it brought me back to Tumblr (needed somewhere to vent my feelings considering I watched the movie a solid THREE YEARS after it came out, Tumblr seemed like the place to go lol). Watched in again in 2020 and it’s just as amazing.

Jekyll and Hyde (All media): Loved this book from the first time I read it in my first year of uni. But in December 2019, my fandom understanding reached its PEAK. The musical?? The comic?? YOOOOOO.

Dear Evan Hansen (Musical): I have BARELY engaged in fandom discourse, but the MUSIC. She fucking SLAPS.

Sirius the Jaeger (TV Series): This show is such an underrated gem. It literally has so much; "dead” family drama? Eclectic international group of monster hunters? Cowboys and vampires?? Yes, yes, and YES. And the main character has the same Japanese voice actor as Atsushi from BSD!

Studio Ghilbi (Films): My love affair with Ghibli goes back to when I was about 5 and BEGGED my mom to take me to the library so we could rent Kiki’s Delivery Service on DVD. But that love has been FULLY rejuvenated this year when I went to the Ghibli Film Festival in New York City (ironically in the last week in February). If you haven’t seen them, go watch From Up On Poppy Hill, Whisper of the Heart, and The Wind Rises. Spoilers, you’re probably gonna cry.

If you’ve made it this far, THANK YOU FOR READING! 

And thank you to all the amazing people that made my 2020 not so horrible. Good riddance 2020, don’t let the door hit you on the way out!

[kinktae]

How dare you bitchin!jungkook ?! HOW DARE YOU ?!

very NOT spoiler free bitchin’ 8 asks under the cut

Y/N SUPPORT GROUP

deliciouslydisturbed365 said: I just read chapter 8 and holy fuck I’m nauseous. Poor Y/N 😭

queen-emon said: What the literal FUCK man, I just read Bitchin 08 and like im so broken. I never ever consider Y/n and I to be the same person but this time I felt like we were the same person both getting our hearts crushed by the man we loved so dearly. I AM NOT OKAY WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME! THIS IS SO NOT GROOVY :(

Anonymous said: Me🤝y/n Repressing our emotions

madjammil said: I am legit crying. Poor y/n! I cannot believe Jungkook slept with Kiri! My heart is broken. I thought these two were finally getting together and he goes and does this dumb shit! Smh. Aside from that, your writing was amazing as always! I love this series so much!

YARA BULLY JK PETITIONERS

Anonymous said: omg i can’t believe jungkook is rly going to get his dickie chopped off 😍😍😍 deserve! can’t wait until yara finds out

Anonymous said: Ignore jk, y/n!!! Gosh she deserve so much better than a fboi who only cares about how he feels physically!! Ahole to the max and I need her to slap him! Yara can join along the slapping game!! But srsly he needs to learn his words alone can’t mend this and I hope y/n doesn’t give in so easily cuz he deserves cold shoulders from her for a very long time and don’t just rely on charms to get his way. Ik he was trouble from the start 😔 y/n dear don’t worry you deserve better

casualxexistence said: So 👉👈 um like is there like ANy chance that we get to see our baby yara’s reaction to this 🥺🥺🥺👼 bc um well I would kinda love to see her hand both jk and kiri there asses bc they aren’t gonna hAVE ANY AFTER SHE FINISHES WITH THEM RIP

Anonymous said: dude, what if y/n hooks up with tae and starts beef between jk and him while yara bitch slaps kiri….. dude bitchin’ has such good drama theories wtf literally anything is possible at this point

Anonymous said: if yara doesn’t punch kook can I punch him? Not as the oc I meant like me BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK

forvever-ddaeng said: I keep rereading this last part like it’s somehow gonna change or it won’t make me sad the more I read it but it’s having the opposite effect and now I want Yara to beat Jungkook’s ass smh

Anonymous said: WTFFFFFFF YARA GONNA HUNT DOWN AND KICK JUNGKOOK ASS FOR HURTING HER BABY

JUNGKOOK ANTIS:

Anonymous said: what the fuck is wrong with bitchin’!jungkook does he think with his dick i wanna kick his ass

Anonymous said: why jungkook would do something like that if he likes y/n? i would be so mad at him too like… isn’t that kind of cheating? he didn’t say if he was back together with his ex but he slept with her so that must mean something, she probably thinks it means something. he was really stupid 

omgtaehyungsmullett said: i know jungkook fucking with me, dammit 😡

Anonymous said: I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD JUNGKOOK DO THAT WHY

ausjeons said: Jungkook what the fuck!!! I could slap you silly after reading part 8 😪😩

Anonymous said: Team make jk suffer for awhile and then be able to patch things up with the oc 🤝

Anonymous said: I read ch8 last night and this weighed heavily on my mind all day like why is jk such a hoe? Like how could he just sleep with Kiri just like that. I think these children are very confuzzled with their feelings. After he slept with Kiri, did he rush to y/n bc he knew this was the end of their “relationship”? One last passionate banger goodbye 😟 my 💔 broken heart

Anonymous said: I ain’t even sad. I’m full on rage mode. WHO TF GAVE JK THE AUDACITY , THE ABSOLUTE BRAWN TO STICK HIS DICK IN KIRI AND THEN , NOT EVEN A FULL DAY LATER ( cuz yk that would be farrr too gracious ) WITHOUT A WARNING , WITHOUT A FRICKING GOOD MORNING EVEN , GOES TO FUCK OC AND THINKS THAT’S OKAY???? Good to know OC and whatever his relationship was with her was worth less than a nut😒

Anonymous said: i’m actually sad… like wow. i really expected him to go back, i really did. but even though i knew it’d happen, it still hurt, y’know? i think that made it worse; knowing that he’d go back to her in the end… shit’s fucked up, really. great job writing it. i could literally feel the emotion from this one.

Anonymous said: Bitchin ch 8…..oh wow the smut was so nice and fluffy but wtf JJK messed up big time. Honestly I don’t think he deserves oc after this. She deserves someone who isn’t so unsure of his feelings that it takes getting back together with and sleeping with someone else to realise it. If he really liked her, he wouldn’t have slept with Kiri.

Anonymous said: “ArE YOu MAd?” Srsly what brand of clown juice is Bitchin JJK drinking?

Anonymous said: TAE AND Y/N HOES BRO ENTER THE NEW SHIP FUCK JK

cchristinnaa said: Jk really did yn like a pocket pussy huh

Anonymous said: HOW COULD JUNGKOOK OH MY GOOODDDDDDDDDDD literally men aint SHIT….. the part where y/n said you got what you wanted from me🥺🥺🥺🥺 I FELT THAT ugh i love the angst

Anonymous said: Hope jk dieS from jealousy next ch. And regrets it skdhdhd :( jk. Hope they get their sht 2gether soon or im gon 😷😖😭

diortae said: me: *explaining to bitchin 8 jk why he’s a dick for calling Y/N his “pretty girl” immediately after fucking her raw the morning after he slept with his ex* 

jk: well, you know what they say. hindsight is 20/20 

me: KINDA SEEMS LIKE REGULAR SIGHT SHOULD HAVE CAUGHT THAT ONE

Anonymous said: JUNGKOOK IS ABOUT TO MEET THESE FISTS UP CLOSE THATS ON GOD THAT DUMBASS LIMP DICK BITCH REALLY FUCKED UP

Anonymous said: I HATE JJK HES AN ASS FOR GG DOWN ON 2WOMEN HE CAN JUS F HIMSELF RN

Anonymous said: JUNGKOOK IS GONNA GET HIS ASS BEATEN UGHSHHSKDHXJSJ MOTHERFUCKER WHAT? WHAT??? THIS BITCH IS A RIDE OR DIE AND UR GOING AFTER FAKEASS KIRI REALLY? FOR REAL I THOUGHT UOU WERE BETTER THAN THIS BUT NO ALL MEN DO IS LIE LIE LIE

Anonymous said: the way i closed the tumblr app when i saw jungkook saying “kiri came over last night”

Anonymous said: alright we beating jk’s ass @ noon 😤

Anonymous said: WHY WOULD JUNGKOOK DO THAT TO OC LIKE WHAT I AGREE WITH OC HE USED HER AND THAT MAKES ME 😡😡😡😡😡

Anonymous said: BITCHIN PART 8 WTFGGGG MY HEART Do be Hurting . i’m going to beat jungkook up !!!!

betysotelo18 said: It’s been a few minutes since I read part 8 and I can’t stop thinking about what could happen next… the meanwhile F U jeon Jungkook, you did wrong

Anonymous said: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! I CANT 😭 WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH THIS CHAPTER HUUUU JUNGKOOK WTFF BRO…….. my heart is breaking for them. Why can’t they just date already wkxbdbbdjdjdjdjdjdj this is onky misunderstanding right? and thankyou for the new chapter sis hihuhihih💕💕

Anonymous said: im shocked i dunno who i hate more rn you or jungkook. my heart is literally SHATTERED he better fix this or else im traveling to the 80s just to kick his ass 😭🤬

Anonymous said: never want to punch jungkook in the face like i wanna do right now

Anonymous said: JUNGKOOK WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUCK 🤬 for the love of god rose why do u did that to me i wanna die

Anonymous said: ROSE WTF WAS THAT MAN !!! my heart it hurts and like wtf jungpuke!! Why would he do that to reader !! why would he sleep with kiri and then sleep with reader ?!? Like go siekkeksjdjejjejdbehhe i wish i can put in reaction pictures in here

CUTIE PIES

Anonymous said: Omggg thank you so so much for this chapter, for the whole fic. Thank you for sharing it with us. You are a great writter. Seriously! I just love how every chapter is so intense. Not only the smut is amazing but every detail, every action, the whole plot, all of the dialogues. I actually cried at the end I love how I can really feel everything. All the emotions. Ah and they’re so cute!!! But why was JK so weak? Even if that’s what you wanted since the beginning… I thought- BOY WTF??? :’( But seriously this is the type of thing I love, I am WEAK for this. The slow burn, the oblivious idiots that love each other but keep suffering thing. And you write it so well. Your mind!!! Your talent!!! I love it. Thank you, for real ♥♥♥ I’m antecipating the next chapter, but already sad that it’s almost ending :((( I’m gonna miss this a lot. Anyways, take your time, baby. And have a nice day! ♥♥♥ (Sorry for bad english btw)

tinievmin said: ROSE. IM IN PAIN. I FELT THE BREAKUP BETWEEN YN AND JUNGKOOK. IM SO SADDD. But not related to the plot, your writing is ART. You always make it flow so well aND WOW!!! I don’t have enough words to express how much I love your works

AND FINALLY, AN INTELLECTUAL

Anonymous said: kiri is a bitch i said what i said

[etlivnheart]

( cody fern, demi male, he/him, fire emblem: three houses ) * &. i know it must be scary for you, dimitri alexandre blaiddyd, after not surviving the takeover. to turn into someone like dimitri a. baker, a twenty-four year-old housekeeper at cozy corner inn & cafe, right here in castle town. just remember that you are as chivalrous as you are misguided, and to be wary, be safe, be true to who you are : heroic through and through. ( back on my bullshit ) 

           alright folks I hope y’all are ready to STRAP YOURSELVES IN bc hoooooooly hell do I have a lot to say abt this kid. he was the muse I originally planned to bring in alongside Zelda when CT first opened for apps bt then I,,, had seconds thots and picked up A Thot sooo. back to square one and I can tELL ALREADY I’ve made a good decision. More under the cut pls but beware of FE3H Blue Lions spoilers !!

⁠— BEFORE CASTLE TOWN

Alright so I’m gonna say this now : Dimitri’s general backstory is no walk in the park , and for some , it may be triggering. I’m going to warn you that this bit will contain some content relating to mental illness ( not named specifically in-game but most prominently ptsd & depression ) , violence/war , and ( parental ) death.

So Dimitri is the crown prince of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus - a wintry kingdom in Northern Fodlan. When you meet him , he’s a student at Garreg Mach Monastery’s Officers Academy & the head of his homeland’s respective house , the Blue Lions.

And at first glance - Dimitri is a fucking sweetheart and he’s diligent , kind , maybe a little cautious especially around fragile objects and there’s always some... allusions that there’s way more to him than this Disney Prince air he seems to carry.

Yeah... there is.

So Dimitri. His parents ( father & stepmother ) died in an incident known as the Tragedy of Duscur where Faerghus’ king and queen were killed , many people died ( including the elder brother of Dimitri’s childhood friend , Felix ) , and the people of Duscur were blamed for it. Ever since , Dimitri’s trauma & survivor’s guilt has only been left to fester and settle to the point where he believes he won’t be able to be at peace until he fulfills revenge for those who passed - to the point where he claims he can also see the ghosts of the dead , ushering him to avenge them.

This tends to manifest in a side of Dimitri that makes him a fierce warrior on the battlefield. But this doesn’t really show full force until the timeskip rolls around , Byleth disappears , and Dimitri’s lost his final crutch and it’s pretty much at this point where his life takes a major turn for the worse - yeah this kid can’t catch a break.

He becomes more and more obsessed with the idea of revenge now that there’s a clear enemy in sight and he constantly is scared of failing his lost loved ones if he can’t succeed in taking her down. He’s been on his own with no-one to hang onto since he thinks his best buddy - who he saved from Duscur - is dead and so many people think he’s dead and once he’s found he’s not the same as in the beginning. He’s now tenfold sucked into that one objective until someone else he loves is lost and normally you think that would only make it worse. But it doesn’t. Since now Byleth’s there.

Byleth’s assistance and compassion teaches him that he can also live for the living and himself rather than focus on only those he lost - and that is what they’d want for him, too. So throughout the rest of the game he reverts back to how he was similarly in the beginning of the game - less aggressive & impulsive and more careful & considerate ( and back to being your typical sweetie ) and he realizes his actions during that period were wrong and he’s willing to atone rather than wallow in his own negativity - and it’s through help him others that he begins to walk a better path and gets his own happy ending in the story ; he learns to forgive and to give chances, even though sometimes those chances are tossed back in his face.

DIMITRI, AS A CHARACTER,,, REALLY MEANS THE WORLD TO ME ( as sb who has ptsd & depression myself ) and his development in my opinion ( since now I’m closing in on all four routes ) is probably the most drastic & in depth of the three lords. 

He does have some issues that he recognizes & comes to terms with seeking help with once he realizes that he’s deserving of it - since Dimitri’s whole thing is that he doesn’t think he’s deserving of anyone’s kindness or love or help or compassion thanks to his own grief & guilt. 

He will give you the shirt off his back and he’s definitely not someone who enjoys being seen on a higher level than others and he’s so human in the sense that he’s one of the only people in Faerghus who refuses to believe Duscur was orchestrated by the Duscurian people. He saves Dedue - who devotes his entire life to him - but only wishes for Dedue to see him as a friend. He just wants a friend.

Some facts !

I forget what the exact word for it is but Dimitri can’t taste anything except... cheese?? Is that it?? Is that where the cheese thing come from?? Yeah basically he can’t taste anything.

He possesses the Crest of Blaiddyd which enhances his strength to superhuman levels to the point where, when he was only eight years old, he snapped a sword clean in half on accident.

Again I will say he’s a major sweetie & I highly recommend at least reading through some of his supports since my god all of them are... so good. I fucking love Dimitri.

Also he’s bi because I fucking said so and it’s a CRIME you can’t s-rank him as both masculine & feminine Byleth.

⁠— BEFORE CASTLE TOWN

SOOOOO Mitya here is a housekeeper at Cozy Corner Inn. He didn’t survive the takeover - but his memories are returning at a quicker pace than that of my other character who didn’t survive, Zelda, as Dimitri’s already beginning to see glimpses of his past throughout dreams

...well, mainly nightmares unfortunately : ( but you get the drill

He has a lot of really awful nightmares but once in a while he dreams of this dark-haired person with a smile that no-one else has and it puts him... at ease whenever he wakes up

I also imagine he routinely volunteers at local shelters or centres or the like just because it’s very In-Character for him to do so

I DON’T HAVE,,, A LOT OF WHAT HIS LIFE IS LIKE IN CT AS OF RN but even tho his eye is never explained in-game he thinks in CT the scar he got over it was from a cat ahsushauhshs

love tht

ANYWAY YEAH IM GONNA WORK ON SAM’S INTRO SOOOOOOOOON but we’ll see if exhaustion doesn’t hit me first

pls gimme byleth i’ll cry

[exrayspex]

life update since i've been away recently

i actually feel like blogging again and am awake enough to do so for the first time in weeks! so, updates bc Stuff has happened:

so my dad had been unemployed (again) for a year almost exactly, and every single job he applied for in his career fell through. we think it's bc word has gotten out in the field that he's an asshole and that his alcoholism is starting to effect his work since his body can't metabolize it like it used to + he regularly injured himself while drinking. which still sucks. but he finally got over himself and started applying for jobs outside his field and got one! it's only part time and the pay isn't great (he's a shopper for a grocery shop + delivery service), but it's something! and we really, REALLY fucking needed it. he's still looking for a better job in his field, too.

phoebe bubba had had an ear infection that wouldn't quite go away even with me regularly cleaning it with special ear wash, and we were finally able to get her in to the vet. she had a bacterial ear infection and we got mediated ear drops for her. i gave them to her and poor baby HATED it, but all two weeks of the ear drops are done and i just checked her ear the other night and it's finally all clean and healthy!

COOKIES. i'm love baking, obviously, and wanted to make a shit ton of christmas cookies and try some new recipes. it took me a While to have the energy for it all, but i got around to it and enjoyed it so much and love the results! i made peanut blossoms, soft gingerbread cookies (which i made into lady and nonbinary gingerbread bears bc fuck men, gingerbread and otherwise), and slice-and-bake shortbread cookies w christmas trees in the middle and red-n-green sugar crystals! i freehanded the green triangles for the center and used very careful chilling and setting out to make the tree-shaped core and then put the un-dyed dough around it to make a round log with the trees holding their shape in the middle. very proud of how well i did on those, and without a tutorial or anything!

so we have been p broke lately and were preparing ourselves for a christmas where we just had delicious cookies and made a nice meal to have together in our pretty decorated room w our tree and foregoing any presents except for one to mail to my wee cousin, but! my mom remembered a couple days ago that my dad had lots of points with airline frequent flyer programs that would expire at the end of the year if they weren't used, that he racked up when working his old job. and the rewards programs allows you to use points to get gift cards for all kinds of places! so she did that and got several gift cards that allowed us to get gifts for some other family members, her boss and the woman she cares for, and have some left over to get each other some things! all without spending any actual money :D my dad and i went to target yesterday and used a gift card to shop for my mom, and it was tiring but fun! and i think my mom got me an over-ear gaming headset to replace my old one that is quite literally disintegrating!

so my phone is a galaxy s3 and i've had it for over 4 years, and my parents have the same. they still work, which is impressive actually, but they're very slow, we can only have a few apps at once bc they're so low on storage, lots of newer apps can't be installed on them, they're unable when anything is updating/downloading, my mom's camera is broken, my dad's has issues with receiving calls, all of them just freeze up completely and have to have the battery taken out to work again pretty regularly, etc. but my dad called sprint yesterday to try and negotiate a lower monthly bill/maybe switch plans, since we hadn't changed plans for years either.....and ended up being able to switch to a Better plan AND get us each a galaxy s7 and still have our monthly bill be $30 cheaper!!! apparently our old plan was a fucking ripoff lol, and he got us previously owned, refurbished phones that cost half the price of new ones of the same model. i think it also helps that he said how he'd been with sprint for over a decade but was looking into switching providers if he couldn't get a better plan and spend less lol. one of the gift cards my mom got is for amazon and i'm hoping i can find some decent cases and screen protectors for all three of us with it!

so i started playing neverwinter online last summer, and i've become hooked lol. i'm also in a good lgbt guild and alliance!! i almost quit the game after i hit max level since i couldn't solo most stuff anymore, but the people in it were all so nice and helpful and not judgey about me being still relatively new to mmos in general (i'd played a little bit of lotro, wow, and eso but not much, and i had once been super into fucking wizard101 lol, but that one's very different from most, actually more like magic the gathering than other mmos). anyway, i've started to break into actually being decently good at the game, i'm on nearly every fucking day lol, and i'm pretty involved in like contributing to guild stuff/running dungeons w guild people, and the dude who is the current guild leader is gonna mostly retire from the game in 2018 and asked me if i'd be up for taking over for him then, and i said yes! he's ranked up my permissions to do guild stuff and has been slowly showing me how to do things and what bugs to look out for when doing them, and it's fun and exciting! plus he's still gonna be around on psn and occasionally in-game after he goes, so i'll still be able to ask him for help/advice since i'm definitely not as knowledgeable as him. i've also been talking more in the guild and alliance chat and on mic too, and it's nice! ooh and i recently did some research and a respec on my main and she's now easily doing like 1.5x her previous damage and i've had a couple people be like "wow holy shit" since which like yes.....YES.....fuel my dps ego.....(also just? people in this game/guild generally seem to like me?? it's so unfamiliar and nice!) ((also also i started a tank alt and got her to max level already! and she's super butch and super hot))

our proposed plan of restoration was submitted to the historical neighborhood board thing and approved! and today the third contractor is gonna come over to discuss what work we'd want done on the house and provide an estimate. then my parents just have to do a bit more paperwork and can finish their application for the grant we can get since we're now in an official nationally recognized historical neighborhood! the grants are given in order of application, and there's currently only one ahead of us, so hopefully we can get it early on in 2018 and have that money to do some much-needed repairs on the house! the bird family living in my windowsill will fucking finally have to move lol. no more screeching and scratching right behind my head every morning! it won't be enough money to get every repair we need done, but it will def cover the worst stuff, like that and our rotted porch! also the contractor we're hoping to use is a nice guy who's done work for us before (he fixed our fence when it broke a while ago, my parents have some mutual friends of his, we trust him), and the other day when he was here my sweet hutchie made friends with him :) there were pets and purrs!

OKAY i think that's mostly it lol. thank you for caring if you actually read all of this! :D you are now up to date on the Life of Spex. also if any of you start playing neverwinter and want a guild invite, lemme know! :)

[strmgrl-blog]

         ━━  alright because i suck & always manage to do things late, i've finally come up with some plots i wanted for hyeon ! i've tried my best to include all sorts of ideas ( please don't be shocked that there's a lot of romantic / sexual ones in here i'm annoying ) under the cut. each idea will have a little description & possibly some inspo linked to it. obviously these can all be altered to anyone who might be interested's liking amongst other things. but please let me know if any of y'all are into these so we can perhaps get some shit going, angels ! i’ll probably break these up into sections based on the type or some cute clever shit grjeoifk anyway 

- ̗̀   ♡  =  𝕣𝕠𝕞𝕒𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕔  /  𝕤𝕖𝕩𝕦𝕒𝕝     ̖́- 

- ̗̀   ☯  =  𝕗𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕕𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕡𝕤  /  𝕡𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕠𝕟𝕚𝕔   ̖́-

- ̗̀   ☠  =   𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕞𝕚𝕖𝕤  /  𝕒𝕟𝕪𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕠𝕩𝕚𝕔    ̖́-

⌠ ♡ ⌡  ━  okie dokie, this one’s a bit of a doozy to explain but my complicated self is gonna try anyway. so before hyeon’s return to the music industry & move to jeju, she was a pretty popular twitch streamer who would often get many donations & messages every day. this is essentially a sugar daddy plot, okay .. GRHUIJK. umm anyway, one specific donor would often give large sums of money to hyeon along with some really flirtatious message, or not but knowing this bitch she probably took it that way bc she’s starved for affection. she was definitely the type of person to want to know her fans on a personal level so she probably made the first move to talk to this big donor & one thing led to another & suddenly hyeon was agreeing to being their sugar baby. this OF COURSE can 100% be platonic or not, the details can be discussed & altered to however we like. just know that hyeon is gross & wants that attention. 

⌠ ☯ ⌡  ━  this is what i like to call operation make hyeon feel important. after leaving her company & starting up her own solo ( practically indie ) career, hyeon essentially left behind everything toxic & bad in her life. including friends. being in jeju, a new place where she knows nobody is hard & has made her feel even more alone than before. please just give this bitch some good ol’ fashioned wholesome best friend shit. hyeon fully believes in the idea of having platonic soulmates & hopes to actually have one, someone she can tell all her bullshit to without feeling like she has to escape immediately after. just ... somebody she feels comfortable with, which admittedly might be a challenge but i’m willing to think of something i’m fucking emo.

⌠ ♡   +   ☠ ⌡  ━  okay so, again, a bit of a doozy tbh. if you read my intro for this baby then you’d know that her parents harassed her for money last year in october. hyeon has worked extremely hard to bury her life, her past, from anyone who might be curious enough to find out who she really is & where she came from. while she was born in busan & partially raised there, there was no doubt people she grew up with. i was thinking, in a cruel manner, imagine if someone from her past who knows about her childhood & buried past suddenly found her once more on jeju & threatened to spill the beans about south korea’s most beloved star ! perhaps in exchange for their silence hyeon agrees to pay them or to date them ( listen ,,, what abt an obsessed fan type of thing holy shit bye )

⌠ ♡   +   ☠ ⌡  ━  hyeon already is a pretty tainted soul. there’s scattered pieces of her all around & she can never seem to place them together. so what if, just maybe, hyeon meets someone who is just as lost & deranged as she is & just maybe something sparks between them. both of them are aware of the negative effect they have on one another but the intense flame between is too much to ignore & always find their way back to each other. friends with benefits but with that forbidden emotion & hidden feeling beneath the surface. 

⌠ ☯ ⌡  ━  can i get a uhhhh strong group of supportive female friends ? listen. i love the aesthetic of that group of women who just STEAM ROLL anyone. they’re strong for each other & love each other, being a system of rocks & tenderness. gimme det girl gang shit ! please. 

⌠ ☠ ⌡  ━  alright how about a good ol’ fashioned rivals type of shit ? maybe they’re both artists of some sort, some weird beef was created between the pair ( maybe they just didn’t vibe together or some stupid shit ) but they’re friendly to each other’s faces but back stabbing lying ass HOES otherwise. this would probably have to be with a male because hyeon simply doesn’t believe in hating a Woman she’d rather kermit GIFUDJKL

⌠ ♡   +   ☯ ⌡  ━  so uh ... i love Pain ! i was thinking of something long distance, alright. like maybe some sort of pen pal type thing, hyeon definitely would have done something like this because she’s lonely. eventually writing letters to one another evolved into texting daily, then skyping, then not being able to gop more than three hours without needing to talk to each other or see one another’s face. this could end with some unrequited feelings or shared feelings or just some idk. emo shit. or even another take on this could be like ... they meet on a dating app, the other person thinks hyeon is a catfish because why would this idol be on tinder ? they end up talking anyway & when they finally meet they see it’s actually hyeon & chaos ensues IRGEHJFKM idk ...

⌠ ♡   +   ☠ ⌡  ━  ummm give me someone who catches hyeon bashing someone’s skull in one night in a flurry of rage & idk maybe teaches her on how to be better & more efficient at killing. it’s dirty & grueling, but more addicting than the drugs they pump in their veins.

& ... that’s it for now probably ! i should’ve put some really generic ones in here more than likely but i really just thrive on being extremely specific & annoying. anyway ! if anyone is interested in any of these, or multiples, please like this or just let me know & ruin my fucking life  (✿ヘᴥヘ)

[itsjesperfahey]

modern soc au

inej: 

loves to dance !!! esp ballet but she can dance to whatever tbfh, she’s that good 

likes to wear caps, esp backwards. really loves bomber jackets too. 

has a couple, small tattoos dedicated to her saints 

is that one kid who loves to do parkour (both ironically and unironically) for instance is really good at it but sometimes just yells PARKOUR and steps over a rock

usually found eating lunch with her pals on the roof of the school 

is amazing at hide and seek like holy fuck ????? hid for 2 hours once and wasn’t found, came back the next day and was like “y'all losers SUCK" 

loves to study other people’s cultures, as well as history and is great as p.e (never has gotten a bad grade in the flexibility tests) 

likes to read poem books 

has a black cat as a pet named "saint" 

pronounced meme as "mehmeh” the first time she read it 

only has snapchat and instagram. is that kid who ALWAYS posts the sunset every day, esp from weird/high places and the comments are always “HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET UP THERE" 

cried the most during fox and the hound 

always braiding nina’s hair. Knows how to do all the super advanced onces as well

"I don’t know, CAN YOU?" 

 the best one at pushing people on the swings 

AMAZING AT JUST DANCE WITH JESPER 

"sorry I ran out of fucks to give try again later maybe?" 

gives the nicest presents. always knows what a person wants for christmas/their birthday 

the one who’s really into photography and is always taking aesthetic™ pics of Nina for her social media accounts 

Prefers tea over coffee

wylan:

bullied for not being able to read (at least up until high school), so is super shy 

loves drawing. the artistic™ one who takes anatomy to be able to draw people better 

MASTER FLUTE MUSICIAN. On the school band. Jams hard af when he plays it 

is in gem math and AP chem with kuwei. 

loves sweet. addicted to blue jolly ranchers. his tongue is always blue 

constantly pushing up his thick rimmed glasses (even if they ain’t on, which causes him to poke his eye)

looooves all the superhero shows on the CW 

V neck sweaters. always

always has his trusty satchel

only has tumblr. has like 10k followers because of his artwork. 

”‘illuminati’ ? is that a band?“ 

cat person even though he’s allergic to cat fur. absolutely adores inej’s cat. settles for owning a horned lizard named "shrek" 

secretly a huge fan of memes 

really gay for tom holland and ed sheeran (calls him "ginger Jesus”) 

gamer with jesper. they always play overwatch together, wylans better tho. a genji and Ana main 

cried the most during big hero six 

wylan, with blank eyes: “I like my coffee how I like my men” // jesper: *spits out his drink* 

matthias: 

sports fan obv. On the schools hockey team bc his fav is hockey. is extremely competitive when he plays it. Is constantly checking but never gets penalties (aka slamming the other players against the walls)

played basketball against jesper and surprisingly lost. jesper won’t let it go 

dog person. owns a pet pomsky (Pomeranian-husky) with nina who’s name is “bub" 

“long hair don’t care”draws inspiration from Harry styles 

really philosophical. takes all the philosophy/ethics classes available 

kind of sounds like Thor (thick and deep accent) 

a good™

"you’re all horrible trash”

“do we really have to be doing this now? I have to finish my homework" 

loves baking. bakes everything for the love of his life 

grey sweatshirts and adidas shoes 

wears contacts Because he hates how glasses look on him. only wears them when he’s home 

oblivious to all the women in love with him

"CAN YOU EVEN LIFT BRO? BECAUSE I SURE AS FRICK CAN” (doesn’t curse) 

real 👍🏻🤘🏻👌🏻life🤰🏻👼🏻🌱student📚✂️✏️athelete🏃🏼🥇🏆🥅🏒

has Facebook and Twitter only

cried the most during bambi and dumbo 

little spoon™ 

has a couple tattoos with very deep meanings

jesper: 

dancer with inej. dances like those ppl who look like robots ??? the ones who look like they freeze parts of their body while the others move. AMAZING at it 

loves jazz but also dubstep/edm and rap/r&b. Beyoncé is MOM/QUEEN. 

sometimes djs parties 

again, huge gamer with wylan. he’s a lucio and junkrat main for overwatch. loves like every video game ever 

loves all the marvel movies, in love with black panther (was team cap) 

dresses like a hipster but also sometimes a fuck boy (tank tops and shorts with a backwards cap style) 

favorite subject is business and debate. great negotiator 

cried the most during the lion king 

A+ cosplayer (especially his lucio cosplay) 

big supporter of human rights (LGBTA+, feminist, black lives matter, poc representation). Will LITERALLY get into fights over anyone who thinks otherwise. Fist fights, always supported by Kaz and Matthias. Got suspended for 3 days for breaking a kids nose who thought LGBTA+ people should **** ** ****) 

that one kid who has 50 fidget spinners and can do cool tricks with them. also manages to sell all of them 

skateboard pro™ 

always sends the blinking face meme, even if it’s out of context 

all the social medias. 

one tattoo only of a gun with a 'bang’ flag coming out of it 

nina: 

 PROFESSIONAL👏🏻 MAKE 👏🏻 UP 👏🏻 ARTISTS 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 HAS HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF FOLLOWERS ON HER INSTAGRAM AND THE SAME FOR HER YOUTUBE CHANNEL 

Speaking of YouTube, she always does cute videos. Baking/cooking tutorial videos featuring Matthias, 'i do my boyfriends makeup’, 'my boyfriend does my makeup’, 'my boyfriend buys my makeup’, does make up tutorials obviously, challenges with her best friend inej like the 'whisper challenge’. everyone loves her and says her and Matthias are their otp 

loves fashion design, takes that class. 

loves horror movies/creepy things but also Disney 

great at roller skating 

always wins the best dressed awards ad school 

also huge fan of ed sheeran. loves little mix more than 5h. 

cried the most during 'up' 

Can speak like 4 languages (English, french, Latin and spanish) 

loves traveling and learning about new cultures too 

dancer!inej’s biggest fan and hockey!matthias’ biggest fan 

always breaks snapchat streaks 

likes to (friendly) debate with jesper, especially over stupid things 

amazing with kids. babysits all the time. calls “bub” (the dog) her and matthias’ baby 

big spoon™ 

notes are so fucking pretty. buys the most expensive stationary and notebooks 

also huge supporter of human rights. runs the feminist club. (Jesper is the Vice President) stresses loving yourself and your body, and makes sure to design comfortable yet GORGEOUS clothes for “"plus sized people”“ 

wins 'dynamic duo’ award with inej 

always eating lollipops 

has a few very small tatos of cute things like roses and crowns. has one quote written in cursive on her rib

kaz: 

prefers black coffee as well 

loves crime shows, whether they’re real or fake. for instance loves both 'Dateline’ and 'Criminal Minds’ also loves 'House’

 favorite class is psychology, learning how a person thinks and acts and feels

has the dregs tattoo on his arm * edge lord 9000™ * such a drama queen and diva like damn 

*deep sigh* "I think I’d rather go take a nap” *gets up and leaves* 

also loves computer science. knows how to hack shit like a pro 

always rough housing with jesper. broke a table once 

does walk with a cane. likes to slap matthias’ ass with it 

“bow down you fucking peasants" 

only types in lower case with 0 emojis and no punctuation marks. CONSTANTLY leaves people on read 

only has Twitter and snapchat. His posts on snapchat never have captions, yet somehow has a 200 day streak with Jesper and a 250 day streak with inej 

loves watching horror movies with nina 

 *in a fight* "oh I’ll sHOW YOU SOME DIRTY HANDS” *swings* 

gets second place for best dressed award 

always sending memes with no context in their group chat, as well as vines 

indie and alternative rock fan 

“does it look like I care because I’m sorry if it does I didn’t mean to give you that impression" 

head over heels for inej Ghafa like wow 

likes to read a lot of mystery books and non fiction books 

cried the most during finding dory 

can solve a Rubik’s cube under a minute and won’t let you forget it 

The one asshole who picks either Kirby or metaknight in super smash brothers brawl

 hates seeing the notification bubble so he always has all chats muted and notifications turned off for apps 

kiss ass to all the teachers to get them A’s

Kuwei: 

SCIENCE NERD. ALWAYS singing the bill nye theme song. Loves ASAPScience on YouTube. Master at chemistry and biology 

"hey did u know bill nye is, like, my dad" 

nina treats him like a baby 

loves everything to do with Star Wars while wylan loves star trek more. Fighting ensues. 

has a pet Siamese cat name sparky 

Used to have a huge crush on jesper and everyone knew it except jesper. 

knows the intro to the bee movie ("according to all known laws of aviation-”)

 jesper in the group chat: “gonna go shower be right back” // kuwei: “without me ;)?” // wylan: “KUWEI SWEAR TO FUCK” // kaz: “watch your fucking language wylan" 

obsessed with Pokémon go even if it died out (chose team instinct) 

"fight me on this" 

has Twitter, snapchat and instagram 

Always drinking ginger ale 

master at bop it 

the one kid who always forgets to pay you back for stuff 

is also into the CW super hero shows, so him and wylan are constantly talking about it 

loves cartoons and anime 

speaks fluent fuckboy 

God awful at comebacks 

"let’s take a selfie guys !!!” // “kuwei no-” // *snapshot sound* 

talks !!! Like !! This !!!! for,,, some reason ???????? 

huge nerd for other things too like lord of the rings and Harry Potter and game of thrones 

cried the most during inside out

 "do you think planes are scared of heights?“ // "for fucks same kuwei it’s 4am”

[blccdsport]

the hacker and the detective: a lenry!au

❝ although you love me, sometimes  we're mean, things can get ugly, but  we're still a team, we are an army,  that breaks from within, but that's why  we're stronger, and that's how we'll win❞ 

@sh4m3less

so, basically while watching this show lately it’s had me thinking about a lenry!au, mainly because it just seems like it genuinely fits them as an au? which is always cool considering they’re probably the hardest ship to fit to any au’s because they’re difficult and problematic™.

anyway, i’m a sucker for making aesthetic’s and i really wanted to for this so that’s a thing. i’m gonna explain kinda the whole plot/idea of what this is about below so enjoy n whatnot.  as usual, if anything seems inaccurate to you or you can’t see it hit me up w/that good shit aka call me the fuck out yo. 

playlist:  because look it’s another thing i’m a slut for, playlists!! to be honest, some of the songs on there are ones i legit just took from a lenry playlist that already exists but w/e. and to be honest, i came across a couple of songs that fit them out of this au too and tbh it was a good time like i’m loving some of these okay shutting up now.

https://open.spotify.com/user/thelittlestmermaid./playlist/0qN62fP9Lm50jBF9iaJul0

plot:

okay so, i wanted to try dodge a part of the tv show plot because i wasn’t sure about applying it to liz but one, it’s an au so, and two, it’s kind of necessary in a way. but basically, in the show at the very very beginning, the main character’s little sister gets kidnapped like, right in front of her, and there wasn’t anything she could actually do about it and it was really messed up. while i couldn’t see it happening in terms of lowri/liz because i just genuinely can’t picture it, part of me considered it happening with liz/karma? just because karma is younger and like the main character in the show she feels a responsibility for her so when she’s kidnapped it really messed her up. 

anyway, that’s key to the plot because the police literally don’t do much in terms of helping, well, liz, find karma. which leads her to take matters into her own hands. instead, she sets up an online chat group for other people in a similiar situation and using the information she’s given by people she speaks to, she hacks into different websites to try and help others find their lost loved ones. which also means going as far as hacking into the police databases. 

at some point, the nypd begin to catch on to her, and so they send someone undercover to try and get close to liz and find out if she’s really fucking with their systems and what in general she’s actually up to. which in this case, the guy they send under cover is henry’s partner. so, mr. partner flirts his way into liz’s life and into her business and they kinda get this thing going and eventually he catches her out and realizes she’s been hacking a bunch of different websites like not just the police databases but like, she’s a literal pro hacker so basically they end up putting her on parole for like six months. which, liz is majorly fucked off about not just because helo she’s stuck with a fucking ankle monitor and is now a known criminal because she liked the guy too? and he just kinda completely fucked her over and no not okay.

so, eventually she gets out on parole and whatnot, but the day she goes to get her monitor removed mr. partner is chilling there waiting for her and liz is v v bitter like ?? pal wyd here? and he basically explains he thinks he should be the one to clear her and she’s kinda lmao why because you’re the reason it’s there orrrrr? but mr. partner guy apologizes for what happened n stuff and is basically lowkey still tryna get in her pants because he liked her too and whatever.

okay so, in the show this chick has this rly cute best friend n she owns a club and she’s just, i love her a lot she’s a great character which, in this au i see being liv? like, liz and liv would be living together or at least how i see it like i’m just going off the show here okay. and liv has this really cool underground club and just, yes. but so liz comes to said club like lmfao guess who just cleared me blah blah. 

so, then a little later on liz n liv are going back to said club and liv mentions that she set liz up on a dating app because honey u need to get over mr. detective this bad. which liz is super ?!?! about at first because rip why. but anyway liz ends up chillin’ in this club and basically being approached by a bunch of guys from this app for the rest of the night n whatnot cool cool. that probably doesn’t seem important but the dating app thing is to the general plot oKAy.

so, she decided to leave which helo welcome to her first encounter w/henry since she seen him last which was likely when she was getting put on parole tbh. so, basically from minute one it’s legit just :)))))))) with one another bc fucking hate ur guts well i hate urs too. but henry basically calls her out like, you know you were on parole you weren’t supposed to put your hands near a computer n shit. because the entire time she’s gotten herself a job at a big corporation company where she can easily do her little hacking work and try help find missing people on a completely different server rather than her home one and he’s like. :-)))) if i was you :-)))) i’d get a job in a big company where i can camouflage myself :-)))) also :-))) we have several invalid log ins to the missing persons debatable js js :-))))) sounds kinda like you :-))))) which has liz like well lol someone has got to do the job that you won’t so. and henry is kinda like lol just because my partner ol’ pal has a thing for you doesn’t mean i won’t arrest you if i need to soOooO.

so liz walks off after that and while she’s on her way back to her n liv’s she gets a text like hey was rly good meeting you tonight to which she’s like ?? new phone who dis? and in the process almost gets hit by a car because no looking where she’s going which the next text ends up being “ouch, that could’ve hurt.” aka leaving liz like?? what the actual fuck?? so the minute she gets home basically she starts searching up each of the guys she spoke to like trying to find out who the fuck it was and in the process gets sent a bunch of pictures from when she almost got hit by the car and she realizes her webcam is on and what the frickle someone is watching me? 

but anyway she talks it out with liv when she gets back and liz decided she wants to go on a date with three of the guys from the app she was using because she suspects its one of those guys. so flash forward to the dates, which are back in that same club n liz is chilling like talking to these guys one at a time and convinces them with an excuse of finding this really addictive game on her phone for them to give her theirs so she can ‘download it’ which in that case she actually installs a tracker and allows herself the access into their phones whenver she pleases. while this is happening liv was lowkey a lil concerned because mm i don’t really want my friend dying so mr. detective ends up there which liz does not likey at all whatsoever because he realizes what she’s doing with the hacking shit and tries to get her to stop the whole date thing.

also, bonus is in that scene the best friend is like “i thought this guy was cheating on me once.. i know, what idiot would cheat on me? but i got her to hack his phone and i watched his every move.” and idk that seems very liv which make’s me laugh like just that start bit.

anyway, liz accidentally picks up one of the wrong phones n goes to retrieve her phone from the one guy that it was but lmAo. because when she does find the guy plot twist he’s dead.

so, she instantly goes to detective boi n his partner aka our fave grump henry haddock. and basically they tried to find where the texts were coming from but it’s just, it’s amusing because she asks to use one of the computers and the guy i basically see henry as is like lol if you can behave yeah maybe. and then legit two seconds later liz takes out this usb like lol so hey this isn’t legal and he’s just ??????? *insert v dramatic eye roll here.*

but it’s just a lot of, her showing them the fact she hacked into the dating app and then cross referenced it to the nypd database which results in just banter between her n henry because he’s just ?? ffs woman?? 

but they figure out that someone is using the app to stalk n kill people so that’s a thing too.

anYWay. so, mr. detective takes liz home n doesn’t wanna let her out of his sights because yano she’s being stalked by a possible serial killer so. but that basically turns into the two of them hooking up n there’s feelings there and all that good shit so.

okay so, while liz is at work in the shitty business place, her computer gets hacked by this stalker serial killer guy and he shows footage of inside her and liv’s apartment which liv is currently walking around in and basically liz is like !! fuck !! because it shows a figure walking around in all black and liz calls her but she doesn’t answer and so she calls detective guy and is freaking out tf. so both her and detective guy start heading toward the apartment and just as liz calls liv again she’s like ?? honey like i’m at the club what are you talking about i’m fine?? aka liz is now like holy fucking shit it was a recording and cop guy is up there and fuck because he’s now not answering his phone either. 

so when liz does get to the apartment there is this weird mannequin doll sitting w/a laptop and when the screen lights up mr cop guy is on there and he starts getting all !! please don’t come looking for me !! but liz recognizes where he is which is the roof of their apartment building so she goes up looking for him and well :-))))))))))))))))))

:-)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

did you guess it??? he’s dead lmfao. 

but he’d called backup before he came so lol henry lands up to the roof and o there’s a very upset usually sassy blonde and o there’s my dead partner well fuck and tbh in the show he legit drags the chick away from the body which is kinda an emotional time i cried my lil bitch ass heart out but anywho.

i liTERALLY JUST WROTE THE ENTIRE FULL FIRST EPISODE AM I OKAY.

i’m trying not to miss any details even though it’s just an au like i’m not trying to be super specific to the show or anything but it’s just there’s a lot of little things that i felt need to explained and added in because they’re important to the general plot?

but basically like, after that i mean i haven’t watched all the episodes yet but i’m genuinely fucking living for the idea of liz and henry then working together. because in the show that’s what happens originally liz is working alone like she always does and she’s back flirting with the two guys from the app from before and trying to figure out which one killed detective guy but it’s fucking with henry’s plan because he’s trying to catch both those guys also because they’re suspects and she’s making it rly difficult when she’s around them too. and there’s this whole scene where he’s parked outside the club and ends up calling her because she walks out with the guy like. :-))))))) we found a body this morning :-))))))) js js :-))))))))))) stop fucking with my shit :-))))))))))) so liz chick is like hA SHIt oKAY goTta GET mE OutTA thiS. coOL Cool. 

but then liz gets approached by a member of the nypd who has figured out that she’s been working the case herself and brings her in like look we could help you and you could help us yano yano. so she teams up with them and it’s beneficial for them both because they get to keep an eye on her and she gets to use their resources. but henry doesn’t appreciate this?? no?? wtf?? get her out?? this bitch fr?? especially because liz decides she’s gonna go on a date with one of the guys they’ve figured is their top suspect of the moment and she has to wear one of those mic’s on her dress and henry guy has to follow the car there and shit.

whICH

THERE IS LITERALLY ONE OF THE BEST SCENES AT THAT POINT AND IT FUCKS ME UP OKAY. 

because liz chick is standing across the street from where he’s parked like. 

“testing testing, how do i look? say what you want it’s not like i can hear you anyway” 

bUT HE FUCKING

SAYS

“beautiful”

anD YOU’RE LIKE

FAM

TF

???????????????????????//

but it’s just like, once she started working with the nypd it hit me how this could be made into a lenry au? because they’re super sassy with one another and it’s basically how lenry are/were with like, it’s very clear they dislike one another but over time feelings v v much grow and it’s just a fucking shitshow tbh because they’re both so ?? i mean basically lenry so it fits like a glove fr. 

BUT LIKE. I WAS THINKING OF THE CANONS THAT COME FROM THAT LIKE. SO SO SO MANY GOOD CANONS OKAY. 

like legit, the entire time she was on the fake date i kept thinking of it as lenry in tha position which it kinda fucks me up because the stalker guy like, hacks into this boat bridge so that henry guys car has to stop following liz girl and her date and momentarily her signal disapears and you can see him genuinely start to freak out like he’s really fucking mad and you’re like what the fuck you care?? what/? bUT IDK MAN OKAY I’M JUST LIVING FOR THIS AND THE AESTHETIC IN GENERAL OF LIKE, LIZ AS A HACKER?? AND HENRY AS A DETECTIVE?? LIKE?? CAN WE??

because i feel like it’s not even unrealistic roles to put them into either?? i’m just really living for this okay so i just needed to share the whole idea of it and whatnot

and it’s just, on top of all the development of their relationship they’re still trying to find this killer/stalker?? and there’s a lot of people still dying and just general shit going down like. 

and the killer keeps leaving clues for liz chick like she figures out why he’s doing what he’s doing and what his method is? which is basically that people portray themselves as perfect and whatnot on social media so when he meets them in real life he finds their flaws and it makes him angry so he targets their flaws in his method of killing. the reason he’s so intrigued by liz chick is because he believes she’s perfect so.

but also like, the best friend throws liz chick a surprise birthday party which at that party the best friend is busy and henry guy was there for a little bit because he had walked up to her apartment with her because there was word that the stalker guy was still out doing stuff and whatever but he leaves because he gets a call but while everyone is distracted liz chick starts feeling really fucked up and then stalker guy kidnaps her but it’s literally only so he can make her watch as he kills one of their suspects and it’s just super fucked up so all this shit would be going on too and just yep.

now to fade out into oblivion because this is ridiculously long noice noice. adios. 

[kinktae]

I’m so proud of you for not only finishing the masterpiece that is Bitchin *chef kiss* but also getting the final chapter out when you were hoping. Every little win should be celebrated so make sure to give yourself some credit x

bitchin 10 asks (finally!)

thefouranemoi said: just finished bitchin! it was soooooos soooooooooo good! im a sucker for a really good slow burn but this wasn't dragged out or overly dramatic. it was perfect and im so glad y/n and jk have each other. thank you for such a series!

sadlemonboy said: i read bitch’n 10 on the bus and was trying so hard to just not cry. i was so good i love it so much. just like thank you

Anonymous said: WHAT'S WITH YARA AND TAE??? ARE THEY TOGETHER??? WILL WE EVER KNOW???

Anonymous said: Buttt just out of curiosity what happened with Yara and Taee, did they became fvckbuddies or smth

forvever-ddaeng said: STOP IM FUCKING SAD ITS OVER :( WHEN I READ “I SLEPT WITH ERIK” I WANTED TO STAB MY EYES OUT LIKE WTF BUT THE PAPER WAS HONESTLY SO FUCKING CUTE IM SO HAPPY WITH HOW THIS TURNED OUT I LOVE YOU AND YOUR BRAIN 🥺 p.s. do you think you’d ever do a drabble or epilogue where we get more of yara and tae? Totally cool if you don’t want to I was just wondering

O.O

Anonymous said: BITCHIN PART 10 WAS SO GOOD!!!! I WAS CRYING LAST MIGHT, THINKING THAT Y/N AND JK WERE JUST GOING TO PART WAYS,,,,HEKDHBFKD FUCKIN HAD ME SCARED. OMG SUCH A GOOD SERIES!!!!! I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT ONE.

Anonymous said: AHHH I LOVED BITCHIN SO MUCH!!! This has always been one of my favorite fics right from the beginning and probably will always be one of my favorites. You did such an amazing job. I’m sad Bitchin era is over but I’m excited for whatever era that will be next:) Thank you for writing this, ILY

Anonymous said: THANK U FOR BITCHIN IT WAS AMAZING

Anonymous said: Bitchin was one wild ride 😭😭 I loved it and can’t wait for more of your rewind series 🥺💕💕

Anonymous said: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💜💜💜😩😩😩😩- my reaction to bitchin final (for now)

Anonymous said: REST IN PEACE BITCHIN AAAAKAAKK.,?!@ FOREVER IN MY HEART GOD DAMMIT I CANT STOPCRYING ARE U HAPPY ROSE DID U LIKE CRUSHING MY FEELINGS LIKE THIS OIOOHNMY GOD 😭😭😭😭

jessiejellybean said: The only thing I can say about bitchin finale is GAJSOSLALHSISSAOWLLANSHSJAKA SERIOUSLY ITS SO GOOD THIS SERIES AS A WHOLE IS UNBELIEVABLY GOOD 10/10 WOULD RECOMMEND

Anonymous said: bitchin was so good😭 i am BEYOND devastated knowing that ill no longer be getting notifs on another update🥺it was so fun to be a part of this journey consisting of having to anticipate for another part to be posted for as long a month! but never have i regretted any second of waiting bcs the result came out so well written and interesting u might as well make it into a hard copy or a movie and get paid loads🤩 keep up the good work❤️

Anonymous said: Funnily enough, you were the first EVER bts blog that I followed because I thought you were funny as hell. Then, you posted part 1 of bitchin and on god I swear I signed my life away for bitchin!jk 🤡. I've officially lived through an era 🥺🥺. I'll miss them but I'll always be the biggest yaraxtae whore 🥵💦 -♒

sydney--chan said: This might sounds totally stupid or whatever, but bitchin' means a lot to me and I'm so happy that you decided to share it with us. Not to get all sad n shit but I started reading this during a really rough period in my life. This story allowed me to forget about all the stuff that was going on, even for just a little bit. This story means so much to me and seeing it end is like making me 😭😭😭 this is the perfect story and I love you and thank you for creating such a beautiful story 

Anonymous said: THAT WAS SO GOOOOOOOD the way u wrote about jungkook’s feelings tugged at my heartstrings like my heart physcially legitimately hurt ur writing was so spot on!! all the details!! Totally worth staying up even though i have class tm

Anonymous said: miss rose i just wanted to stop by and say thank you for always giving us such masterpieces. as a jk whore (ot7 whore in general but ya know) bitchin was just *chefs kiss* i literally looked forward to Sundays bc I knew there was a chance a new chapter would be posted lol. I am sad to see bitchin end but am also suuuuper excited to support your new fics and anything else you come out with. you’re the best. love ya 💕

Anonymous said: Bitchin' 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I'm going to say this for the umpteenth time... IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOOD. It's one of the best fanfictions out there and I'm gonna re-read it at least five more times. Thank you so much for blessing us with this bounty! Take care! 💜💜

koru-rhi said: I should really be asleep but I had to finish Bitchin & I went back and reread it from the beginning to the end and I just want you to know how much I loved it! It was a beautiful smuttyfluffyangsty ride and I can’t wait to read more of your writing! I totally lost it at Everything I Didn’t Say 😫 btw.

Anonymous said: Wow bitchin is over... what is there to look forward to now on this app :(

Anonymous said: I AM NOT CRYING, YOU ARE ALL CRYING I CNA IT THE END DNDMSM MY POOR HEART. AGHHHH SNAMAMA PLEASE,WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME. YOU ARE KILLING ME. I DON'T KNOW IF I AM SAD OR HAPPY OR BOTH.

Anonymous said: UGH! bitchin 10 was amazing *chef’s kiss* I sobbed, I felt their earnest love for each other. A real roller coaster just like my emotions rn. Ngl I sound like a middle aged white mom giving a book review 💀 anygays I just wanted to say that I love ur stories and they’re always so well written

betysotelo18 said: Bitchin'...has me in tears! For some reason I thought this was going to have smut...Who needs smut! This was PERFECT! The damn piece of paper made tears roll down my cheeks! I loved every single chapter. Thanks for sharing

deewhalien21 said: Waiting bitchin part 10 was hell, couldn’t imagine living without them now😔 I’m going to miss them, like a lot. And thank u for good memories with these people mam, thank u for making me experiencing heart break that I could never have. I’m waiting another great stories❤️😔

lalumaia said: That was just perfect, Rose. Thank you, I love you

Anonymous said: hi, bitchin was soooo good and every time you uploaded i felt so happy and excited for the next one, thank you for all your work!

Anonymous said: when i saw the warning said “angst” i was so worried they wouldn’t end up together :( thank you for this rose this was such a beautiful story and experience!!! love u lots angel

Anonymous said: ROSE HOLY SHIT THAT WAS SO GOOD !!!!!!!!

unknowntalesx said: ROSE IM CRYING WHAT THE FUCK I LOVED THAT SO MUCH MY HEART WAS BEING SQUEEZED AND TORN AND I HAD/HAVE LITERAL TEARS RUNNING DOWN MY FACE

Anonymous said: OMG CANT BELIEVE BITCHIN IS OVER 😭😭 i loved everything from the beginning till the end 💜 THANK U FOR WRITING SUCH AMAZING STORY

Anonymous said: On god bitchin is the best series I’ve ever read on this app. The ending was great too! Just sad that it’s over :( thanks for writing it

Anonymous said: FAM YOU GOT ME CRYING IN THE CLUB WITH BITCHIN PT. 10! I absolutely adore your work so much and Bitchin was absolutely beautiful and so fantastic to read. I love it and you so much! Thank you for giving us something so beautiful ❤️ P.S. now take a long break girl because you deserve it

Hi friends! I can’t even begin to explain how much every single comment/like/reblog/ask in regards to bitchin has meant to me